Showing posts with label worry. Show all posts
Showing posts with label worry. Show all posts

Thursday, September 20, 2007

Tales of the City


Last night I found out that Tuesday someone was assaulted right around the corner from my place. To say it was shocking was an understatement; seriously, it was for me a blow to my sense of security and peace of mind. Apparently – I tried to find a story on the WaPo unsuccessfully – the person attacked had parked down the hill (this is a one way street with the park on one side and house on the other) and was walking up hill when he was cornered by two guys that pushed him to the ground and took his wallet and cell phone and Lord knows what else. From the email that the president o the block sent, the person went to the hospital, and I ma hoping everything is fine and it was just a scare. But momentarily and for a while I will be uneasy every time I park and walk to my place with a laptop, a gym bag and plenty of paraphernalia needed when one works so far away from home that one carries with oneself half one’s thing every morning.

I am not even going to go into the usual discussion, the two attackers are the “usual” suspects, and that is all. I mean we live in a city and cities are dangerous places. I know that. I also know that it happens everywhere, in Gtown, in Mt Pleasant, in Columbia Heights, everywhere, so no one is free of it, not even the people in Potomac, from what happened there this week. But still, what is one to do, I can not be home at 6 every night locked away safely, I need to go out, swim, come back home, so the answer is to continue one’s life. Even if I have a rational discussion about this, I am still afraid, at least a little bit. I guess time will take the fright away, and in a couple of months I will be able too park and not look for suspicious people. But for the time being, you betcha I have a plan and I will be overtly alert.

Friday, March 02, 2007

Fear


This Sunday, yours truly will travel to North Carolina to start a new chapter in the laboral life – is that the right term in English, I am not sure. Yesterday as I was wrapping things up and seeing how there is a lot that I need to get done today, I suffered and anxiety attack as I was driving back to the gym. Many things went through my head, all of them at the same time, here is a glimpse:

  • I am not bright enough and I will stink at the new project
  • I will eat like a hog and become the Michelin man
  • I will not be able to deal with the travel back and forth
  • I will hate the people there and shut down slowly but surely
  • I will miss all this things happening in DC and will be slowly forgotten

I know I am an idiot for thinking all these, but when you are home, tired after a long week and the only thing on TV is an old rerun of Ugly Betty, you mind can spin out of control. I did what any self respecting fag would do, had some chocolate, took 2 Tylenol PM’s, read for 30 minutes and was asleep at 10 pm.

Today the sun is out there, and I am feeling better, getting things done – as much as I can. Even planning on getting myself a new personal laptop for personal uses in my travels.