Trimming the Christmas card list

I am one of those gays that likes to send Christmas cards. It is time consuming, and it is he kind of gesture that probably makes some people cringe and think that I have way too much time on my hands. But as you all know this is not the case, it is not that I have too much time in my hands, it is just that I like to send cards with handwritten messages to the people I care about. I think that they are the best way to say in a meaningful way I care about you, and I want you to be a part of my life. I might not see some of the recipients often, other I see almost every day, but they are all important to me and I want all of them to know that I am thinking of them even in a month when we are all running like headless chickens trying to get shopping done, attending parties and just hanging on to the few threads of sanity we have.

This year, I went and bought cards in November, hoping to start writing during the thanksgiving weekend, well as usual the cards are there waiting. I have started the list of recipients and this year I am trimming down. It is kind of sad when you make a list of all the people you want to write and send a card to, and then you end up putting question marks at the end of someones name. The question mark reflects my thought on where the friendship is, and more, it asks the question does this person even give a damn if I send them a card. They do not mean that I do not like the person or enjoy their company, but ask a real question that in this day and age is important, should I invest 15 or 20 minutes in writing a personalized note to this person, knowing that they will not care. The answer to this is no, absolutely no. If the person doesn’t care, then why bother really. So the hard decisions made, people were definitely nixed from the list.

I feel bad about it, at some level it reflects badly on me, because maybe I have failed to remain close to some, or I have failed to spend time with others. It is worth considering am I the one pushing people away, but then in the end, no is the answer again. I have no t pushed people away and I believe that life is a two way street, and when a relationship with someone becomes a huge one way street (like 15th street for instance, the fastest way to leave the city by the way) then it is not worth keeping. That was the revelation of today, well more of last week when in between breaks and meeting I came up with the list of people I need to communicate with. When time is of the essence, then it is better to spend it on the people who care about you than on the people who do not.

^{PS. A picture of a cute playful otter, to remind us that we are all young at heart or something like that.}